Well, I bit the bullet yesterday and decided to book myself an acupuncture and massage therapy appointment back-to-back. I fought the urge to cancel about a million times because it seemed silly to be spending money on myself, BUT..........it was amazing!
Acupunture has turned into a major love of mine. I spend time reading books, looking at charts, and beyond curious as to how it all works. I've told my Doctor my love for acupunture and he believes it would be a great road for me to travel into. I was beyond excited to meet the acupuncturist yesterday. More so even, to just ask him questions and pick his brain. I love to find out what points connect to each body part and how it all flows. After he inserted all the needles, he left me to relax. It felt amazing. My body went into a different state. The needles just take over me and I felt zero pain. I didn't want my session to end.
This is the second time I have seen this particular massage therapist. She is a talker. I mean. Talker. I know all about her hot husband(this is how she refers to him), 2 labors, her moving situation, all her family, her favorite color....purple, and birth to current. But for some reason, I've let her work on me. Maybe it's just due to the close location or that the acupuncturist is in the same building. I guess the real reason is, I am desperate. Completely. Desperate. I can't say that my times with her are not painful for me. She finds my troubled areas and goes full force. I lay on her table very scared and full of pain, but something in my head keeps telling me how great it is to get the blood flowing in these awful areas.
This morning I awoke to ZERO pain! There wasn't any sharp shooting, aching, wanna not get out of bed pain. I opened my eyes before Jesse's PT alarm sounded. And told him that I felt amazing. I was scared to move...still am. But for goodness sake, I was gifted with moments of normal. And for that I needed to share.
This road is sure hard to explain, express, and help everyone around me understand. I barely understand it myself. I am blessed with many people in my life that support me and comfort me. But, I do know that a constant medical condition that is so unheard of and very unrelateable is hard to grasp. It gets old and annoying. I've found that I've closed up to speaking about it. Even to my husband. I get tired of the constant explaining of ...urgh, I hurt. As I am sure, he gets sick of hearing how much I hurt. But, I am trying. I do yoga to strengthen. As painful as that is for me. It is still a major accomplishment. I can't believe that after a year in bed, my body allows me to move thru my pain to get in all those positions. It is a constant reminder to me that anything is possible and I AM going to find a way to live and deal with this constant pain.
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